love is short, forgetting is so long

So I watched this terrible movie about a man who was caught between past memories of his first love and his current life. The movie was not worth mention, however I was intrigued that in the opening credit of the movie, there was a quote from one of my favorite poets, Pablo Neruda.

So this is his poem. I tried to upload a video, but it doesn't seem to work. Sorry about that.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write for example, 'The night is shattered

and the blue stars shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.

I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.

How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear immense night, still more immense without her.

And the verse falls to the soul like dew to a pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.

The night is shattered and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. 
In the distance.

My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight searches for her as though to go to her.

My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.

We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.

My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. Like my kisses before.

Her voice. Her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.

Love is short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms

my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer

and these the last verses that I write for her.

ni hao, xie xie

I have no idea how many of my previous posts started with how long I have not posted any posts due to being busy at work. Disregard the fact that it might bore you, my friends, the way I started each post for the last 3 months, I actually have been quite busy. 

Recently I just moved to a new house (I told you, didn't I?). There are at least a box or two that I haven't unpacked yet. And at work, we just have this new management which I'm still adjusting to. I just feel bad to not be able to check on my friends, to not meet them as often as I wish I could.

Anyway, for almost a couple of weeks now, there are two very important family friends who stay with us, a man and his wife. I'm absolutely fine with it since mostly I was alone at home. Although sometimes I feel some portion of my privacy has been taken away. 

They're actually from mainland China and they barely speak Bahasa. And since I hardly speak Mandarin (don't let my Chinese eyes fool you!), our conversations always involve miming. I once literally was sounding Moo and Oink to ask / answer questions regarding what a dish made of. Even after my two weeks vacation in Hong Kong, the only mandarin I know is: xie xie and ni hao. As for them, the only Bahasa words they seem to know are bir and mabuk. So you can only imagine how the dinner time went for the last two weeks. HAHAHAHA.

Beside the free dinner for the last two weeks, I also enjoy learning new habits from them. Our dining utensils include chopsticks and bowl instead of spoon, fork and plate. I have been remastering my skill using chopstick. Not bad, I must say. From the blog I found online, I learned that chopstick has been used for at least five thousands years ago. There was an idea that they used chopstick to avoid burning their hands when they tried to get the food out of a pot.

There's even a belief from Confucius, that men should avoid using sharp and pointed utensils (such as knives and fork), which represent violence. One should be in a happy and good mood when they're at the dining table. This is a very interesting, isn't it?

I personally also believe, using a tiny bowl and chopstick also teach us to only take the food in a moderate way due to limited space. A few years back, my brother started this diet, eating only using a tiny bowl and chopstick so he only dined in small portions. Too bad, it didn't go for long.

Although I couldn't find it anywhere, but somehow I believe to take a piece of dish from our dinner companions reflects honoring the recipient. 

a traveler's tale: a very long 20 minutes

As the pilot announced that we soon would land at Kuala Lumpur International Airport in 20 minutes, my nephew Billy was sleeping on my lap. For that very long 20 minutes, I couldn't help myself to ask this question: what's worse than traveling with a kid? Traveling with a sick kid.

Not that I was being cruel and rude, but series of questions and ideas that popped in my head were: 

1. Maybe I should send him back to Jakarta
2. Maybe I could just leave him in a pawn shop and collect him on my way back from Hongkong
3. Give him a couple of hundreds bucks and said, "see you, kid!"

And no, I decided to stick to initial plan and hoped that he'd get better in time. Apparently, Billy does not share the same traveling spirit I have. He doesn't really enjoy cruising and learning about the new environments and cultures. Breakfast for him is anything served in 3 minutes or less, while I was having this wild dream of enjoying dimsum in Hongkong, bakut tea in Singapore, or some other local dishes.

I also questioned my decision of taking this huge responsibility. What affected my decision of not traveling alone? Certainly not because I needed someone to take my photo with Mickey Mouse. Or maybe I was too chicken shit? Then I remember it's because I care for my nephew, this is his gift for passing the challenging grade six. He deserves this. Maybe he's not at his best condition, this is when I come in, be a good supporter.

And ...

He just asked whether it's possible I could carry his backpack as well. Arrrghhh.

So yeah, it's going to be a little bumpy, more work and less fun, but I must also keep in mind these two keywords: #holiday, #adventure. Also, I must keep in mind that he just turned 12, he after all is just a kid. I have made my decision and I must stick to it. Alright, I'm ready to fly again, Hongkong here I come!

adieu whitney houston

I think it was the late 80s when I first watched her video, I wanna Dance with Somebody. I wasn't really know who she was and I was just this young boy. All I know is that she's American with a big hair and it was a very colorful video. Later, I understood that she's one of the world's most successful singers.

Then I'm Your Baby Tonight was released in the early 90s. Followed by The Bodyguard, a couple of years later. I remember how I repeatedly played only the first 4 songs from the album at the attic of my old house here in Pluit. I believe I might have caused a few of unaware embarrassed moments by trying to sing out loud I Have Nothing which caused a stir. Not that I sang it good, but my mother thought I was in pain or something. That period of my life also confirmed that I cannot sing.

Whitney Houston's songs have been part of my life in a way. Exhale was one of the songs I listened to when I had a crush with my classmate during my high school years (now you can guess how old I am). I remember how a good friend sent me her duet with Cece Winans, Count on Me as I left Jakarta to live in Philly in 2001. 

I read about this very shocking unfortunate news on Sunday morning and realized that an icon, a little part of my childhood has forever gone. I often told my friend that Whitney Houston deserved a huge comeback and I strongly believed she could have done it.

Anyway, many have posted her interviews with Diane Sawyer or Oprah talking about her addictions. As much as I'm terribly sorry to watch those videos, I think I prefer to remember her as that skinny cheerful American with a big hair-do singing: "so when the night falls, my lonely heart calls."

Adieu, Whitney Houston (1963 - 2012).

betty white's if you ask me (and of course you won't)

Book: If You Ask Me (And Of Course You Won't)
Author: Betty White
Published: May 2011

A few weeks before the new year, there was this survey on twitter on how many books people read in 2011. There was this young woman who read around 100 books and this other guy who read around 50 books. I was tremendously ashamed of how lazy I was that year. I seriously am ashamed even to write this post, for I didn't finish reading any books for the whole year, not even one.

So I decided that this year I should read more. I should commit to at least read more book (more than none. HAHAHA). So the first book of the year is Betty White's If You Ask Me (And Of Course You Won't). Published in May 2011, I had a hunch that this one is a perfect kick-off and I was right. It's light, it's funny, it's honest, it made me laugh and in many chapter, Betty talks a lot about aging (New Year, du'uh!).

You can actually get away with anything when you're 89 years old. You can say anything, you can do anything and you can actually laugh at anything. I'm positively sure that no one will be offended. You have that privilege once you reach certain age. Betty White certainly knows this advantage and uses  the most out of it.

Fortunate for us, that Betty White has a kind heart and a good sense of humor. If You Ask Me manages to not be a book about trashy gossips, but it only puts a little of that essence to it. It cleverly plays facts regarding movie stars without implying of making any bad judgement. It's sophisticated in the most simple way possible.

She talks a lot about her new television gigs include Hot in Cleveland, hosting SNL and Super Bowl commercial. She mentions a lot of famous names from a wide range of generation without any consideration of being offensive. The way they're mentioned, it makes you think what a wonderful person she must be.

One of the chapter that made me giggle a lot was when she disclosed her admiration towards Robert Redford after watching Out of Africa and how Redford sent her a poem when she won a SAG this year, which she unapologetically chose not to share what he wrote for her. Good for Betty!

I also enjoy how she tells her personal stories. The warmth, the closeness, her passion, the amazing relationship she shared with her husband, her parents and her love for nature touch me. While reading this funny memoir, I at many points could see how humble she is and came to this understanding maybe these are the key ingredients to be successful in everything we do in life, be humble and be passionate.

Betty White, for the truest it can be (it is), you are the queen and we are your people. God bless the queen.

For my next reading "assignment", I have Diane Keaton's Then Again, Pride and Prejudice and Zombie (I know!) and PD James' Death Comes to Pemberley. Exciting!

madonna

1984, pada acara MTV Video Music Awards yang pertama, seorang perempuan dengan dandanan ala seorang pengantin perempuan bergulingan di atas panggung sambil berdendang. Laksana seorang pengantin yang berperilaku tak pantas, sang publicist penyanyi perempuan tersebut (Liz Rosernberg) dibisiki oleh teman kencannya sambil menunjuk kepada penyanyi tersebut: Bagaimana mungkin dia bisa melakukan itu?! Kariernya telah berakhir saat ini juga.

Penyanyi perempuan tersebut adalah Madonna, lagu yang didendangkan adalah Like a Virgin.

Dan pernyataan teman kencan Liz Rosernberg sangat keliru (begitu pula asumsi jutaan orang yang membandingkan Madonna dengan Cyndi Lauper). Madonna menjadi salah satu penyanyi perempuan yang paling dikenal seantero jagat dan boleh juga dibilang sebagai penyanyi perempuan yang paling berhasil dalam sejarah rekaman.

Sangat sulit untuk menerima rentang karier Madonna tanpa mengerutkan dahi. Madonna yang dikenal sebagai sang manipulator media. Di awal tahun kariernya, dia tidak pernah dianggap sebagai penyanyi yang serius. Madonna hanya seorang pencipta kontroversi.

Like a Prayer, setelah lebih dari sepuluh tahun dari waktu pertama kali diedarkan, kini disebut-sebut sebagai salah satu album yang penting. Tetapi kontroversi video dari lagu dengan judul yang sama juga membakar amarah gereja waktu itu.

Madonna dan MTV adalah contoh sempurna dari simbiosis mutualisme. Mereka saling memanfaatkan. Madonna sebagai manipulator media, menggunakan MTV sebagai bentuk promosi dan sebaliknya MTV yang baru saja diluncurkan mendompleng kontroversi Madonna.

Walau bersahabat, beberapa kali MTV melarang penayangan video-video Madonna. Pertama kali, Justify My Love yang dinilai terlalu sensual. Pelarangan ini justru menciptakan produk baru yaitu video single dan Justify My Love terjual 500ribu kopi, sehingga disebut sebagai video terlaris hingga saat ini. Erotica dan What It Feels Like for a Girl adalah video-video lain yang dilarang penayangannya oleh MTV.

Madonna juga tercatat sebagai penyanyi solo dengan penghasilan terbesar dalam pertunjukan konser. Perjalanan konser terakhirnya, Sticky and Sweet menghasilkan lebih dari 200juta USD. Madonna juga dicatat sebagai penyanyi dengan TOP-TEN single terbanyak di daftar tembang Billboard Hot 100 mengalahkan Elvis baru-baru ini.

Saya sempat tersentuh ketika menonton salah satu dokumenter Madonna, I'm Going to Tell You a Secret, di mana di salah satu adegan film itu, Madonna memberikan pesan kepada para pendukung konsernya dalam hidup untuk selalu bertanggung jawab (be responsible) dan mempunyai kasih (have compassion) untuk sesamanya, karena menurut Madonna, dua hal itu lah yang menjadikan seseorang manusia yang lebih baik.

Saya lebih kaget lagi mengetahui di balik penampilannya yang tampak "rusak", justru Madonna adalah orang yang sangat memperhatikan kesehatannya. Dia tidak merokok, menjaga makanannya dan dikenal sebagai salah seorang penyanyi yang paling sehat di dunia. Jika kita menghitung jumlah penyanyi dari tahun 80an yang masih ada hingga ini, tampaknya tidak banyak yah. Kalaupun masih hidup, pasti sedang dililit oleh masalah. Ingat Whitney?

Saya tidak berniat mengajarkan anak-anak untuk mendengarkan Madonna yang nota-bene belum pantas bagi mereka. Tetapi paling tidak ada satu hal yang bisa kita pelajari dari seorang Madonna: to live a good life and be a better person, one must be responsible for his actions and have compassion for others.

adieu, vida!

On Monday, Patrick Swayze died at 57 after a battle with pancreatic cancer. I'm never a fan of Swayze. I don't even like Ghost. But his bravery to take the role of Vida Boheme in "To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar" made him a dearest to me and Golden Globe agreed to nominate him as the best actor in the comedy/musical category.

We will always remember Patrick Swayze, an actor, a singer, a dancer, a song-writer and a Vida Boheme. Adieu.

gone too soon

On Thursday (25 June 2009), one of the world's greatest performers, Michael Jackson passed away. He was 50 years old. Michael Jackson was expected to have a comeback in July 2009 where he initially would start his 50 performances in London.

His life for the last four or five years had been a big circus. The trial, the debt, the crazy behaviors, they all seemed to drag him away from what he's best at, being a performer. I'm glad some of the medias, decided to remember Jackson as a legend he once was.

He was (and is) the king of pop that wowed everyone with his moonwalk 20 years ago, the legend that created phenomenal videos and dance moves. He should be remembered as the man who desired to make the world a better place and he's also the man that inspired many today's pop stars.

Like a comet blazing across the evening sky, he's gone too soon.